Arms Wide Open

I have said it repeatedly, but I continue to be overwhelmed by the flood of support we have received in my Mom’s passing. Between facebook, twitter, text, emails, phone calls and voice mails, the response has just been amazing. It is a testimony to my Mom. One thing that has been an anchor for us are the stories of her legacy. Things like:

“I can honestly say that my husband and I wouldn’t be together today without the loving example and time that your mom took with us.”

“Your mom took me under her wing when I moved to Cleveland for grad school – I always appreciated her having me over to your house.”

“When Bryan and I moved to Cleveland she just welcomed us as part of your family. We were so far from home and had no real family but she made us apart of yours and I am very grateful.”

“Your mom was an inspiration to me during my years of being in Bible study with her. She was so encouraging and Godly. Those were treasured times those Thursday morning Bible Studies with the ladies. They shaped me.”

“Your mom is a truly inspiring woman with a heart full of Christ’s love to share with others. She is a treasure.”

“I can’t stop thinking of all the angles she has made over the years, thinking that she will be rejoicing when she has lived her life to be…with Jesus”

“So thankful that we will all get to enjoy her smile (and maybe some lemonade on the porch) again one day”

“She holds a special place in my heart and in my family’s as well. So many chats on the front porch come to mind with lemonade and Penny as well!”

Friends I could go on and on with the notes we have received. This is just a small sample of the memories and legacy my Mom leaves. There is so much there for each one of us. If you knew her or not, you can see the impact we can have when we care about and for others. I included the last two comments because there was something so special about the front porch of the home I grew up in. It was my Moms “office” and where she healed broken hearts (including mine more than once), mended relationships, listened to hurts, extended grace, taught faith and shared some lemonade. Even the mailman got his fill of homemade lemonade on a hot day. That’s just who she was. She knew no stranger and always had an ear to listen or a shoulder to cry on.

I’m obviously working through the healing process in one of the ways I know how and that is to write. If you can bear with me, I guess my point is that we all have an “office”. They don’t make houses like they used to – with front porches, but most of us have a deck on the back of the house. Coffee shops are places where we can meet. Ballgames, picnic’s and even the church foyer are places where we can mean it when we say “I’ll be praying for you”. My Mom had no formal degree in counseling, she just had a heart full of Jesus and a passion to share it.

We all can too.

A post I read over at Dad-Blogs.com regarding faith and parenting, along with an “episode” tonight with our children and their AWANA homework are on my mind at the moment. So much so that I thought I would sit down here at the keyboard and work it through. It all started with a comment that a Pastor friend of mine made a few years ago. Not only is he a Pastor, he is a Dad. He spoke about how he and his wife made the decision early in their parenting that they wanted their kids to have “their own faith” and not “their Mom and Dad’s faith”. Something in that stuck out to me. Our kids were really young at the time so I tucked it away for further reference.

Well, now would be “further reference”. I am so blessed to say that all three of our children have asked Jesus to be in their heart. There is no greater gift that I can think of for my wife I to know that our children are walking with Jesus. But here is what I want more than anything, I want them to have (to quote Depeche Mode) their own personal Jesus. I don’t want them to have my Jesus. My relationship with my Jesus is different. My needs, struggles, failures and grace quota are experienced, shared and discussed with My Jesus. Our relationship is personal, private and unique.

I want my son to have his own personal relationship too. When he is struggling in school, sports, relationships and with sin, I want him to call out to his Jesus. I want him to walk with Him, lean on Him, discern from Him, grow with Him. When my girls are searching for identity and struggling with pressure, I want them to rely on Jesus. Their Jesus. I want them to find beauty in their relationship with their Jesus and identity in the gifts He has given them.

Don’t get me wrong, as their Dad I have to provide love, identity, validation and support too. Yet I am human. I fail. I will fail them no matter how hard I have tried not to. That is why they need their Jesus. That is why it must be their relationship and not Mom and Dads.

And so we go through the delicate balance of teaching, guiding, providing places and opportunities for them to meet with Him while not making it “Religion”. Lord grant us the wisdom to know how to make space for you, for them and for personal relationships to grow and be their own.

You can blame it on the way I’m wired. I love music. Those that know me (or follow me on twitter) have probably seen that my music tastes are all over the map. I have said it before and I will say it again, my iPod is a scary place. You’ll find everything from Wayne Newton to Marlyn Manson. Like I said, it’s a scary place.

In my defense, I will say that I find lyrics to be one of the greatest things in this life. I like to pick songs apart and lyrically dissect them for meaning and application. Many of the songs in my collection can have a story that goes with them. Some great stories, some I’d just as soon forget. My iPod is like a soundtrack for my life. As crazy as that sounds.

So when I was running today I heard the song “Come Back to Me” by David Cook. I get very reflective when I run (which is why my iPod is essential) so this song got me to thinking. I began to imagine the lyrics almost like a letter from God. While I am sure this breaks several theological rules and regulations, stick with me for a bit. The entire song began to remind me of the patience, the grace and the pursuit that our Heavenly Father has as we “find ourselves”. I began to consider His patience as we seem to try everything until we realize nothing will fill that void.

Check out this lyric:

I can’t get close if you’re not there
I can’t get inside if there’s no soul to bear
I can’t fix you. I can’t save you
Its something you have to do

So i’ll let you go
I’ll set you free
And when you see what you need to see
When you find you come back to me
Come back to me

Again, theologically there are probably some holes, but if you asked David Cook (or whomever wrote this song) I’m sure it wasn’t the intended message or audience. However there was something that struck me in that bridge. The thought that God cannot draw near if we are “not there“. The image that the Holy Spirit can’t get inside if there’s “no soul to bear“. Even the message that he can’t save us, it’s something we have to do. While Jesus died to save all of us on the cross, that “something you have to do” is accept that gift. So he “let’s us go and set’s us free“. Our journey to find ourselves often ends up at the foot of the cross where we come back to our first love.

I share it because it was a great reminder to me. Maybe it was a great reminder to you today as well.

Lyrically speaking….

A few weeks ago, I was flipping channels in time to see Michael Jordan’s induction speech for the Basketball Hall of Fame. You all know me enough by now to now that I bleed Carolina Blue. I defend the colors. I am obsessed with it’s history. But I will be the first to say this….Michael, you were a jerk. “The boy” and I often watch old clips of “His Airness” so he can see the amazing gifts and abilities of the greatest player to ever play. I’m thankful that “the boy” wasn’t watching the night I stumbled across MJ’s speech. I would have had some “splaining to do”. Enter “The Admiral”, David Robinson…..

If I need a video clip of what it means to reach the top and never forget who and what got you there, this is it. This is the complete opposite of MJ’s speech. This is a man that has never apologized for his faith or his love for his family. Watch this clip (if you don’t have time, watch the beginning for what he says to his family and forward it to the 6:41 mark to hear the end). Thank you David Robinson. You are in a class by yourself.

By the way, all was not lost. Former Tar Heel Larry Brown was on stage to represent the Carolina Blue during David’s Speech.

If there is one film that I want to see more than any other this fall, it is this one. I am drawn into this trailer and have watched it several times. If the film is anything like the few short moments of this clip, I can only imagine the impact. I read a tweet review from someone that got a screening over the weekend and said it was incredibly powerful. I cannot think of a more timely and appropriate message. From the films website:

If you were to meet ten average Americans on the street, nine of them would say they believe in God. So why is the Gospel of Love dividing America?

Dan Merchant put on his bumper-sticker-clad jumpsuit and decided to find out why the Gospel of Love is dividing America. After talking with scores of men and women on streets all across the nation, and also interviewing many well-known active participants in today’s “Culture Wars,” Dan realized that the public discussion of faith doesn’t have to be contentious.

Lord, Save Us From Your Followers is a fast-paced, highly engaging documentary that explores the collision of faith and culture in America. After seeing Lord, Save Us From Your Followers, you’ll never talk about faith the same way again!