For several days now I have tried to wrap my head and words around those times and questions that we have for a God that created this universe. I have wrestled with anger, frustration, sadness, pain and as odd as it sounds, hope. I end each thought process at a place where I find myself searching for an anchor and something we can grab hold of. I get so tangled up in trying to understand how a loving God allows the unthinkable to happen. Yet the very next breathe is thanking a loving God for conquering the grave and the hope of eternal life.
For days I have tried to put this all into some words of encouragement for anyone and everyone that is a part of the journey with our dear friend. While trying to do this for this blog and anyone that reads it, I guess I am looking for the answers myself too. Friends, I don’t have them. The only wisdom and encouragement that I can offer comes in two very simple things that I have learned in my 38 years.
1. God is God.
2. It’s never how we draw it up
Steven Curtis Chapman so perfectly captured the simplistic thought that says that “God is God and I am not”. Our finite minds wrestle with trying to understand an infinite God. Our understanding of today prevents us from seeing the entire picture. We are only getting a glimpse of a masterpiece that God is creating. How many of us can connect the dots of our past to see that a much larger story was taking place? God is God.
So often I think I’ve got a perfect plan as to how my life should go. In my mind, it seems to make perfect sense. Yet when I stop long enough to reflect on the past I see how my plan would have gone radically different. In almost each case, it would have been a mess. Gods grace, mercy and perfect plan have saved me from myself more times then I can count. His wisdom and knowledge are to be trusted. I say, with a thankful heart, that it is never how we draw it up.
So what is our anchor? What is our hope? What are the words that make situations and circumstances beyond our understanding seem to make sense? Friends, this side of heaven, I am not sure we have those answers. I know I don’t. I know that God is God and I am not. I know that God is still on his throne. I know that the creator of this universe is in complete control. I know that his ways are perfect. I know that he has a plan far greater than my understanding. I know that he makes all things beautiful in his time. I know that he can restore what was once broken. I know that he can provide comfort to the hurting and peace in the storm.
Max Lucado once wrote that “God doesn’t always still the storm, but he will calm the sailor“. That’s my anchor and what I am grabbing hold of.
In just 4 short days I will wrap up a goal I was forced into recently set. “D-Rich, Amanda, my wife and I will take part in a 4 mile run on Thanksgiving morning. Compared to the 2 marathons my wife and Amanda have run, I feel almost silly mentioning it. When taken in perspective though and considering what my fitness level was just 6 weeks ago, it’s a marathon to me! I have certainly gained a new appreciation for anyone that will go out there and pound out 26 miles in one day.
In terms of updates, I guess I am as ready as I will ever be. According to the Nike+ log from my iPod, I have logged 106 miles on 25 runs. I missed about 2 weeks of tracking since I didn’t get the Nike+ until I got serious about this thing. I have been able to pick up the pace by about 2 minutes as well. That’s the good news. The bad news is that as I sit here this morning, I’ve got a “bad wheel”. Last week my left hip started barking at me and I can’t seem to find a stretch to make it stop barking. It feels a bit like Bo Jackson’s famous injury at the moment.
I’ve got 4 days to get it worked out so I should be road ready in time. I’m too competitive to quit at this point. I’m looking forward to getting out there and seeing what happens. I’d like to thank my wife and “D-Rich” for giving me the kick I needed to get started. We’ll talk more about the future when I get through this one. Hopefully it will be in one piece!
I have a feeling I am late on the bandwagon here, but I am becoming a big, big fan of the band 33 Miles! They just released their second CD which has the song “One Life to Live” on it. They deliver music that will have you celebrating our position in Christ one minute and moved by the emotion of the journey the next. There are several songs on both of their CD’s that are in constant rotation for me right now in the midst of some healing.
My good friend Jen recently asked me who I would compare them to. The closest I could think of today was Rascal Flatts. If you haven’t heard of them, take a few minutes to download either of their CD’s today. You’ll be glad you did.
By now it has been well documented that I am a Tar Heel fan living in Buckeye country. Just because I bleed Carolina blue it doesn’t mean it’s not fun to get a little caught up in the whole OSU vs. Michigan fun. After all, Ohio State is my second favorite college team. With sincere apologies to my brother-in-law Joel, I had to post this.
One minute and twenty six seconds left. That’s it. Less then two stinkin’ minutes from sure victory and now we’ve lost a key member of that depth that all UNC fans have been bragging about. By now you probably know that Tyler Zeller is likely lost for the year with a broken left wrist. I remember last year when Bobby Frasor went down with the knee injury everyone treated it like a blip on the radar. Yet his loss turned out to be a critical part of the teams lack of depth last year. While “Q” played well beyond expectations, Bobby loss was huge.
I have always had two complaints when it comes to Coach Roy. Number one, his track record of great regular seasons and huge tourney disappointments is well documented. Number two, I have always thought that he leaves his starters in the game entirely too long. When these games become blowouts, the bench should be finishing out the string. Zellers injury is a prime example. Why have one of your top recruits in the game with “Psycho T” still nursing his leg?
That’s the gloom part of the story. More than likely Hansbrough will return tomorrow or next week in Maui. Ed Davis has been a beast on the boards so far. Dion Thompson has also played very, very well. You still hate to lost a guy like Zeller with 1:26 left in the game.
I sit here this evening with no words. All day I have pondered, prayed and tried to wrap my finite mind around the ways and wonders of an infinite God. My friends, I don’t have the words. I wish I could be a source of encouragement to you today, particularly those of us that are working through the emotions, thoughts and feelings for our dear friend and his family. What I have come to is this…God is still on his throne.
One of my favorite moments of the day and this life is when my children climb up in my lap. To rest my chin upon the top of their head and just feel them near is to know peace. In those moments of silence, the last thing we need are words. The closeness of the moment covers them all. Our Heavenly Father longs for these moments too. He longs to have us climb up in his lap and seek his grace, his wisdom, his peace and his strength. A time where we can be still. Even when there are no words…
Inspired by my wife and with a little “push” by my good friend “D-Rich”, I recently started running jogging. Don’t tell either of them, but I am secretly enjoying it. My knees are not enjoying it nearly as much as my mind though. Anyone that has run knows that so much of the battle is mental. It’s pushing yourself to another goal and beyond what you perceive as pain. It’s digging in deep to find something that will carry you the next mile. I recently discovered something that really helps… prayer.
I have been amazed at how quickly that next goal approaches when I take the focus off of myself, my pain, my lack of energy and focus on that prayer list in my mind. It’s the list of people I have said “I’ll be praying for you” and quickly forgot to keep my word. It has been amazing to see how those names quickly come to mind as I am, if nothing else, just speaking their name. God knows their need. He doesn’t need me to go on and on and on about the request.
There is one request I would like to extend to anyone and everyone that reads this blog. Many of you follow the journey of my good friend Stefan Tarapchak. If you think of it today, would you mind praying for Stefan and his family? I will admit that there are times that I don’t know what to pray. I don’t have the answers or the words to pray. I don’t know what to say, but I know who hears our requests. As Casting Crowns sings:
You don’t need the answers
to all of life’s questions
Just know that he loves them
Stay by their side
How about you? How can I pray for you today? Is there someone or something on your heart that I can join with you in praying for?
By now I am sure everyone knows that Carolina crushed University of Kentucky last night. You never know how a team will respond to an upset, so it was good to see the Heels break Kentucky’s spirit early. The other thing that I really liked to see was the defensive effort. Yes, Kentucky was terrible. Yes, they turned the ball over 25 times. Part of the credit has to be given to the defensive effort of the Heels. That was something that was seriously lacking last year.
Roy knows that no matter how good you are offensively, you have GOT to be able to bring the D if you want to win it all. This team looks committed to the defensive end. We all know they will score points in bunches. If they can play the D and keep everyone healthy, they will be tough to beat. Keeping everyone healthy appears to be the bigger challenge at this point. Here’s hoping Zeller’s injury isn’t serious. We’re going to need to be at full strength in Maui if we’re going to come away a winner. Michigan State is also looming in early December.
Game 2 was a joy to watch. Seeing in HD literally almost brought a tear to my eye. I told my wife it was one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen. Next up, UC Santa Barbara on Friday.
For several days now I have tried to wrap my head and words around those times and questions that we have for a God that created this universe. I have wrestled with anger, frustration, sadness, pain and as odd as it sounds, hope. I end each thought process at a place where I find myself searching for an anchor and something we can grab hold of. I get so tangled up in trying to understand how a loving God allows the unthinkable to happen. Yet the very next breathe is thanking a loving God for conquering the grave and the hope of eternal life.
